I know this is just all in fun for a good charity but let’s have fun with all the falsehoods our dear Mr. Wilson has set up.
1. Counter-false: If humans were meant to mate and procreate the species we should have been wiped out by bears a long time ago.
2. Counter-false: Only if the audience matters. If done in rhythmic fashion it would standard, mundane, boring. If done out of rhythmic fashion, new fads are born, social norms get shaken and new artistic generations bloom. If done wrong… We will all be like Elane Benes.
3. Counter-false: There are no prerequisites to criticism just degrees of approach. And Objectivity? HA! Since when there was ever an objective human.. oh wait. But at least un-biased feedback is not absolute… unless they really don’t like you.
4. Counter-false: Wrong! Proving the existence or non-existence of god while increasing the federal budget and at the same time, cutting the federal deficit (via Yakko Warner). Neurological micro-surgery of the brain is a cakewalk compared to those two. Or as consolation, Hitting a baseball traveling at 90 mph with astigmatism.
5. Counter-false: If that’s the case why hasn’t it been out yet? and if it did, every emo-based entry in social media, every rant and fail video’s value on youtube would crash overnight.
5. Fucking counter-false!: Bears. Or human bot-flies.
6. Counter… Nope, got me there. Because we all know, we as a species never liked change.